Over the years I've been reading Ourselves: Our souls and Our bodies by Charlotte Mason. I've read it with my children, I've read it with other moms, I've read it with my husband when we completed the Idyll Challenge. And now I'm going to read it with a mother-daughter book group.
I've blogged in the past about how I have found a mother-daughter book group to be relationship building as you head into the adolescent years. I've tried to do intentional things to facilitate more communication to last through the teen years.
Now that I've reached my third daughter I'm finding a new way. We've finished the Beautiful Girlhood reprint by Karen Andreola and now are on to Ourselves as a team. With other mother daughter teams at our side.
Do you wish to join us?
Here's the link to our plans.
I hope to share more as we go along.
Showing posts with label mother-daughter relationship. Show all posts
Showing posts with label mother-daughter relationship. Show all posts
Saturday, August 18, 2018
Tuesday, February 20, 2018
What's in Ambleside, England?
Why would a midwestern mom of six kids want with a small town in the middle of the Lake District of England?
Lots!
Charlotte Mason, the educational philosopher and college director, lived her most famous years in Ambleside. She, on the shoulders of those philosophers before her, challenged the teachers of her day to consider a new way of teaching.
She chose a very remote, beautiful area of England to start her school. Perhaps her connections to the area, or her fondness of Wordsworth, or her ability to find nature just out her door helped her to find this place which would be the head quarters and remaining foot hold of her philosophy until today.
In May 2017, my first graduate from our Charlotte Mason homeschool and I traveled to the Lake District. It takes a a good half of a day to travel from London to Ambleside currently. The travel we took included a fast train, a bus ride and foot path walking. I can only imagine what it must have been like to travel in a carriage pulled by a horse!
Here are a few looks at our favorite spots.
Lots!
Charlotte Mason, the educational philosopher and college director, lived her most famous years in Ambleside. She, on the shoulders of those philosophers before her, challenged the teachers of her day to consider a new way of teaching.
She chose a very remote, beautiful area of England to start her school. Perhaps her connections to the area, or her fondness of Wordsworth, or her ability to find nature just out her door helped her to find this place which would be the head quarters and remaining foot hold of her philosophy until today.
In May 2017, my first graduate from our Charlotte Mason homeschool and I traveled to the Lake District. It takes a a good half of a day to travel from London to Ambleside currently. The travel we took included a fast train, a bus ride and foot path walking. I can only imagine what it must have been like to travel in a carriage pulled by a horse!
Here are a few looks at our favorite spots.
 |
| Charlotte Mason's grave and the small headstone for her secretary extraordinaire, Elsie Kitching. |
 |
| Charlotte Mason's desk, currently on display in the Armitt Museum |
 |
| Some nature lists found in the Archives of the Armitt Museum |
 |
| A country neighbors home, William Wordsworth |
 |
| Looking out from Wordsworths home onto his garden |
 |
| Beatrix Potters home, another country neighbor! |
 |
| Coniston Lake being sung to by a robin on a gate |
 |
| The beehive at what was Charlotte Masons college |
 |
| Scale How looking amazingly large from the lower parking lot |
 |
| Walking the Sweden Bridge trail above Ambleside. This is a hike Charlotte would have taken her students on from time to time. |
Sunday, September 10, 2017
New beginnings
This past month I helped my daughter move into her college dorm. It's quite a transition from going from a Charlotte Mason homeschool setting to a public conservatory/university. She had learned the habit of sharing (with five younger siblings) so the prospect of sharing a room with only one person seemed easy!
Homeschooling affords some opportunities of sheltering our children. I took those opportunities. I watched over those early years of influence. We were careful about protecting our eyes and ears from seeing and watching things that would hinder our growth both in the spiritual and physical realms.
I gently helped create boundaries to allow for silence in her life. I fostered chances to volunteer and to rest. I wondered if this would be enough. Would she have internalized the hopes we had for her? Would she find the habit of silence and nature and beauty for herself?
As my children have grown, we have allowed them more and more freedom to learn about the harshness of the world and the realities that exist. But going from a safe Christian environment both in home and school and circles of friends, to not having any of those things that are familiar is quite a shock. I prayed that the Holy Spirit would continue to be heard by her. That she would take advantage of the opportunities of new experiences and choose well. And I continue to pray.
I talk to my college aged daughter everyday right now. I ask her what things fill her time. I was delighted to hear of her need for continuing those things that brought life into our home and homeschool. There is a botanical garden across the street from her dorm. She's so well known by the front check in person that she no longer has to show her ID. We share photo texts of plants we find interesting. I love seeing the flora and fauna that catch her eye these days. I hope she likes seeing things from back home.
She's been fostering friendships outside of her college as well. Just in the first month she has spent weekends with Charlotte Mason families, couples who no longer have children at home and families who don't homeschool. She has a desire to volunteer at a local church. It makes my heart glad and helps to balance my tears to know that she is finding her way.
Have you found new beginnings to be both stretching and balancing?
Homeschooling affords some opportunities of sheltering our children. I took those opportunities. I watched over those early years of influence. We were careful about protecting our eyes and ears from seeing and watching things that would hinder our growth both in the spiritual and physical realms.
I gently helped create boundaries to allow for silence in her life. I fostered chances to volunteer and to rest. I wondered if this would be enough. Would she have internalized the hopes we had for her? Would she find the habit of silence and nature and beauty for herself?
As my children have grown, we have allowed them more and more freedom to learn about the harshness of the world and the realities that exist. But going from a safe Christian environment both in home and school and circles of friends, to not having any of those things that are familiar is quite a shock. I prayed that the Holy Spirit would continue to be heard by her. That she would take advantage of the opportunities of new experiences and choose well. And I continue to pray.
I talk to my college aged daughter everyday right now. I ask her what things fill her time. I was delighted to hear of her need for continuing those things that brought life into our home and homeschool. There is a botanical garden across the street from her dorm. She's so well known by the front check in person that she no longer has to show her ID. We share photo texts of plants we find interesting. I love seeing the flora and fauna that catch her eye these days. I hope she likes seeing things from back home.
She's been fostering friendships outside of her college as well. Just in the first month she has spent weekends with Charlotte Mason families, couples who no longer have children at home and families who don't homeschool. She has a desire to volunteer at a local church. It makes my heart glad and helps to balance my tears to know that she is finding her way.
Have you found new beginnings to be both stretching and balancing?
Monday, April 3, 2017
It's that time again.
My fourth child has reached her 10th year. Sob. Why does time slip through my fingers like water? She's ready for the Industry program that I've used with my older three kids.
She's ready for some special book reading with just mom.
{This will be my third daughter to do this kind of focused learning and reading together.}
And I know that it works.
Last fall my husband and I left our 17 year old daughter in charge of all the kids while we went on a trip.
for 15 days(!)
So I am doing a Industry journey now with my next daughter.
Did I say that I have a fourth child that isn't 'a little' anymore?
For the past three weeks we have been making bread together. She's doing wonderfully. So it's time to be very focused on this type of learning together. Getting a perspective of the future when she's a woman capable of keeping a house and home of her own. And soon she will be baking the bread without me.
And she will do amazing with this little lesson of life over the next 8 years.
I'll try not to blink. But drink in each moment of growing and savor it.
She's ready for some special book reading with just mom.
{This will be my third daughter to do this kind of focused learning and reading together.}
And I know that it works.
Last fall my husband and I left our 17 year old daughter in charge of all the kids while we went on a trip.
for 15 days(!)
So I am doing a Industry journey now with my next daughter.
Did I say that I have a fourth child that isn't 'a little' anymore?
For the past three weeks we have been making bread together. She's doing wonderfully. So it's time to be very focused on this type of learning together. Getting a perspective of the future when she's a woman capable of keeping a house and home of her own. And soon she will be baking the bread without me.
And she will do amazing with this little lesson of life over the next 8 years.
I'll try not to blink. But drink in each moment of growing and savor it.
Monday, February 16, 2015
Reflect and Anticipate
Three years ago I attended my first LER (Living Education Retreat). I was inspired to keep learning more and more about Charlotte Mason's principles and now to apply them.
I'm anticipating a wonderful time again this year. I'm bringing along my oldest teenage daughters.
I'm anticipating a wonderful time again this year. I'm bringing along my oldest teenage daughters.
Thursday, August 7, 2014
Industry
I've been contemplating how to help my children become well rounded adults for many years now. I mainly want them to grow into people I continue to enjoy being around! (That's what I mean by well rounded!...having a wide understanding of many things and ability to speak about many topics)
One thing I want them to do is to carry on conversations with people of all settings. And to make those people feel welcomed and at home with my children. To do this, they need to know the basics of keeping a house. And they need to know an inch deep into every thing I can introduce them to over their 18 years in my care and under my roof!
I wrote a guide for growing in Industry for my oldest child the year she turned 10. We made it into a celebration and ceremony for her. I am beginning this with my third child this year. I've tweaked the booklet I made to reflect things that a boy might find a bit more interesting. I'm looking forward to seeing how he approaches this.
I've been so pleased with the growth that my daughters have had with this prompting. I encourage them to spend about 10 minutes per week planning a way to work through this book. It might mean adding things to the grocery list so that they can cook something during afternoon occupations. It might mean asking a grand parent or older adult to model how to compete a task. It's been a gentle way to become a person of Industry!
Click here for updated version! And by all means, adjust it to fit your families needs.
One thing I want them to do is to carry on conversations with people of all settings. And to make those people feel welcomed and at home with my children. To do this, they need to know the basics of keeping a house. And they need to know an inch deep into every thing I can introduce them to over their 18 years in my care and under my roof!
I wrote a guide for growing in Industry for my oldest child the year she turned 10. We made it into a celebration and ceremony for her. I am beginning this with my third child this year. I've tweaked the booklet I made to reflect things that a boy might find a bit more interesting. I'm looking forward to seeing how he approaches this.
I've been so pleased with the growth that my daughters have had with this prompting. I encourage them to spend about 10 minutes per week planning a way to work through this book. It might mean adding things to the grocery list so that they can cook something during afternoon occupations. It might mean asking a grand parent or older adult to model how to compete a task. It's been a gentle way to become a person of Industry!
Click here for updated version! And by all means, adjust it to fit your families needs.
Sunday, May 5, 2013
Helping our daughters with virtue: the older girls version
Nothing we teach our children is made clear in one moment.
It's the millions of moments over years that drip into the bucket of their lives. It's the constant stream of unconsciousness that sets in motion the beliefs they have.
The direct conversations we have with them,
the simple concepts we share with them...
these are the things that are their apprenticeship into adulthood.
I reflect on the apprenticeship my husband and I had before we married. We laugh as we think of the 20+ years of learning different behaviors and responses we each brought to our marriage. We were both raised in Christian homes, yet our philosophies and responses to each new activity in life was so different. We learned so much about each other and even more about ourselves that first year of marriage. (I learned how selfish I was.)
We continue to learn more about each other every year.
But do you think about the best apprenticeship for our daughters to grow into Godly women?
Each moment. Each day. Each breath can be a way to send them in the right direction.
And each time we fail to reach the goal we have set for ourselves is a gift to begin again the next time.
So what have we used in this household?
You can see my post about what I use for books with younger girls here.
We spend much time studying the lives of godly people. Persons as diverse as Maria Goretti to Elisabeth Eliot to Ruth from the Bible. We spend much time reading books which integrate our whole persons with our whole Faith.
The most meaningful conversations I have with my girls are those conversations we don't have. The 'conversations' of the way I act and what I say to others that they hear and see each day. My actions speak LOUDER than my words. But that doesn't mean we don't have intentional conversations. We do. Often.
Both my 11 year old and 13 year old are in Mother-Daughter Book groups that I organized. We meet monthly with like minded mothers and daughters to talk through the changes and graces given them as they grow through these tween and teen years.
Beautiful Girlhood revised by Karen Andreola
Joyful Mysteries of Life for Children
Before you Meet Prince Charming by Sarah Malley
I Kissed Dating Goodbye by Joshua Harris
Purity is not just sexual purity, but rather keeping all parts of us pure. Creating screens in which to filter all around what we hear, see and do is important. Keeping our hearts pure means putting virtue in and continuing to grow it. Keeping our minds pure from watching things that might pollute our hearts means being vigilant about everything we see on screens or read.
I'm a stickler at what I let my kids watch on screens. I took to heart the Academy of Pediatrics recommendations to not let children under 2 watch any TV at all. (It's really hard with baby #6!) The only TV that my children watch is PBS and that's only on Saturday mornings. If there is anything else on PBS that they want to see we wait until mom has previewed it and then watch it on a DVD...sometimes months or years later.
Recently I have been letting my oldest daughter watch a PBS series with me. We tend to only watch it through the PBS.org as we never have all the other children bedded down in time to watch it "live". It's been a way for us to connect and have even more discussions!
I keep a limit on computer time and it's always in a main room of our house were others are watching every move the child makes. (no computers, ipads or tv's allowed in bedrooms!)
Always pursuing virtue and finding an intentional beginning.
In our family, we use the Passport to Purity as a beginning of the intentional conversation about changes on the horizon. Because we have been blessed with many children, we have had multitudes of conversations about conception, life and changing bodies. This weekend retreat is a one-on-one time with mother and daughter to start the conversation that will intensify over the next 6-8 years.
The weekends I have spent with my two oldest daughters individually have been blessed times. We do the activities recommended by the Raineys on the CDs. Enjoy some personal time and quiet time together both at Mass and beside a pool. We enjoy a simple meals together and also a fancy dinner with daddy at the end of the weekend. I choose to do these weekends close to home, yet away, so as to create a distinction from the conversations we have with brothers and sisters within the home.
This is also a time that I institute a Mother-Daughter notebook. This is a simple spiral notebook in which we have a two way conversation on paper. When I have something to share or something difficult to say, I write it all down and put the notebook under her pillow. She then has possession of the notebook until she sees fit to return it under my pillow with her own thoughts recorded on the next page. It's a blessing to look back through our notebooks and see how my daughters have grown in their thought processes over the years.
Clothing IS non verbal communication.
Have you seen this fun Truth or Bare facts?
Dana Greesh has some great ideas about modesty and girls. They have been very helpful. Her books for moms about ways to talk with daughters might be helpful for persons who want to change the tone in their household to more openness.
I want the desire to dress modesty to come from within the heart of my daughters, not from exterior rewards or punishments. I want them to look beautiful yet not attracting the wrong kind of attention.
I often see my daughters challenging each other on the way they dress. They have encouraged my husband to consider their dress as well. When the tone comes from the child upwards, there seems to be less tension. When I demand a certain way of dressing, it becomes authoritarian and breaks down communication between us.
I remember one year when my oldest daughter was 11 or 12. I had been out of town in the winter and found a delightful store of expensive dresses having a sale. The dresses were all smocked and ruffled. They were just the most modest delightful dresses. So I bought one and saved it for Easter.
When Easter rolled around, my daughters taste in clothes had changed. She wanted to look more grown up and a smocked dress did not suit her tastes anymore. My mind had dollar signs in it. Hers did not. Did she wear the dress? She did. But not happily. And took it off as soon as we arrived home from church. The dress was never worn again by her.
It took me some time to repair the stress I caused by making her wear it. Thankfully with other daughters in this family, it has been worn again. And the maturity level of my other daughter isn't quite the same so she thought smocking was wonderful! But I learned a good lesson here. What I desire most is connection and openness with my children. Forcing a dress to be worn did not encourage positive communication.
As I reflect on the moments left to intentionally impact my children towards God's goodness, my emotions are mixed with horror at what little time is left and the joy of growth I have seen in them. I know I can influence them for good, yet it will be their decision to choose to follow God's plan or to walk their own road. I pray for my daughters each day that the blank page of their lives, waiting to be written, will be in line with the plan of God.
Do you consider ways to be more intentional about helping your daughters (or sons!) intro growing who God wants them to be?
It's the millions of moments over years that drip into the bucket of their lives. It's the constant stream of unconsciousness that sets in motion the beliefs they have.
The direct conversations we have with them,
the simple concepts we share with them...
these are the things that are their apprenticeship into adulthood.
I reflect on the apprenticeship my husband and I had before we married. We laugh as we think of the 20+ years of learning different behaviors and responses we each brought to our marriage. We were both raised in Christian homes, yet our philosophies and responses to each new activity in life was so different. We learned so much about each other and even more about ourselves that first year of marriage. (I learned how selfish I was.)
We continue to learn more about each other every year.
But do you think about the best apprenticeship for our daughters to grow into Godly women?
Each moment. Each day. Each breath can be a way to send them in the right direction.
And each time we fail to reach the goal we have set for ourselves is a gift to begin again the next time.
So what have we used in this household?
You can see my post about what I use for books with younger girls here.
We spend much time studying the lives of godly people. Persons as diverse as Maria Goretti to Elisabeth Eliot to Ruth from the Bible. We spend much time reading books which integrate our whole persons with our whole Faith.
The most meaningful conversations I have with my girls are those conversations we don't have. The 'conversations' of the way I act and what I say to others that they hear and see each day. My actions speak LOUDER than my words. But that doesn't mean we don't have intentional conversations. We do. Often.
Both my 11 year old and 13 year old are in Mother-Daughter Book groups that I organized. We meet monthly with like minded mothers and daughters to talk through the changes and graces given them as they grow through these tween and teen years.
Some of the texts which we have found helpful: (these are in order to which we have read them)
Beautiful Girlhood revised by Karen Andreola
Joyful Mysteries of Life for Children
Before you Meet Prince Charming by Sarah Malley
I Kissed Dating Goodbye by Joshua Harris
Purity is not just sexual purity, but rather keeping all parts of us pure. Creating screens in which to filter all around what we hear, see and do is important. Keeping our hearts pure means putting virtue in and continuing to grow it. Keeping our minds pure from watching things that might pollute our hearts means being vigilant about everything we see on screens or read.
I'm a stickler at what I let my kids watch on screens. I took to heart the Academy of Pediatrics recommendations to not let children under 2 watch any TV at all. (It's really hard with baby #6!) The only TV that my children watch is PBS and that's only on Saturday mornings. If there is anything else on PBS that they want to see we wait until mom has previewed it and then watch it on a DVD...sometimes months or years later.
Recently I have been letting my oldest daughter watch a PBS series with me. We tend to only watch it through the PBS.org as we never have all the other children bedded down in time to watch it "live". It's been a way for us to connect and have even more discussions!
I keep a limit on computer time and it's always in a main room of our house were others are watching every move the child makes. (no computers, ipads or tv's allowed in bedrooms!)
Always pursuing virtue and finding an intentional beginning.
In our family, we use the Passport to Purity as a beginning of the intentional conversation about changes on the horizon. Because we have been blessed with many children, we have had multitudes of conversations about conception, life and changing bodies. This weekend retreat is a one-on-one time with mother and daughter to start the conversation that will intensify over the next 6-8 years.
The weekends I have spent with my two oldest daughters individually have been blessed times. We do the activities recommended by the Raineys on the CDs. Enjoy some personal time and quiet time together both at Mass and beside a pool. We enjoy a simple meals together and also a fancy dinner with daddy at the end of the weekend. I choose to do these weekends close to home, yet away, so as to create a distinction from the conversations we have with brothers and sisters within the home.
This is also a time that I institute a Mother-Daughter notebook. This is a simple spiral notebook in which we have a two way conversation on paper. When I have something to share or something difficult to say, I write it all down and put the notebook under her pillow. She then has possession of the notebook until she sees fit to return it under my pillow with her own thoughts recorded on the next page. It's a blessing to look back through our notebooks and see how my daughters have grown in their thought processes over the years.
Clothing IS non verbal communication.
Have you seen this fun Truth or Bare facts?
Dana Greesh has some great ideas about modesty and girls. They have been very helpful. Her books for moms about ways to talk with daughters might be helpful for persons who want to change the tone in their household to more openness.
I want the desire to dress modesty to come from within the heart of my daughters, not from exterior rewards or punishments. I want them to look beautiful yet not attracting the wrong kind of attention.
I often see my daughters challenging each other on the way they dress. They have encouraged my husband to consider their dress as well. When the tone comes from the child upwards, there seems to be less tension. When I demand a certain way of dressing, it becomes authoritarian and breaks down communication between us.
I remember one year when my oldest daughter was 11 or 12. I had been out of town in the winter and found a delightful store of expensive dresses having a sale. The dresses were all smocked and ruffled. They were just the most modest delightful dresses. So I bought one and saved it for Easter.
When Easter rolled around, my daughters taste in clothes had changed. She wanted to look more grown up and a smocked dress did not suit her tastes anymore. My mind had dollar signs in it. Hers did not. Did she wear the dress? She did. But not happily. And took it off as soon as we arrived home from church. The dress was never worn again by her.
It took me some time to repair the stress I caused by making her wear it. Thankfully with other daughters in this family, it has been worn again. And the maturity level of my other daughter isn't quite the same so she thought smocking was wonderful! But I learned a good lesson here. What I desire most is connection and openness with my children. Forcing a dress to be worn did not encourage positive communication.
As I reflect on the moments left to intentionally impact my children towards God's goodness, my emotions are mixed with horror at what little time is left and the joy of growth I have seen in them. I know I can influence them for good, yet it will be their decision to choose to follow God's plan or to walk their own road. I pray for my daughters each day that the blank page of their lives, waiting to be written, will be in line with the plan of God.
Do you consider ways to be more intentional about helping your daughters (or sons!) intro growing who God wants them to be?
Thursday, November 29, 2012
A day in the life...
Perhaps once a quarter I do a review of our day. This time I tried to keep track of the daily happenings. Have you wondered what a mother of six does all day? Have a look.
6:30am nurse a toddler, potty him
6:40 shower and dress--and even blow dry my hair
7:00 back to bed for coffee in bed (brought by my 8yo son) and personal prayer time
7:30 return two emails from my phone and head downstairs, encourage children to get dressed
8:00 supervise breakfast making in the kitchen
8:35 nurse 2 month old and begin prayer time with kids, Jesse Tree and OT readings
9:15 13 year old leave for band at the local high school
9:30 find toddler with all the stickers dumped out...help to clean these up, reading to 10yo and 8yo
9:50 2nd breakfast for toddler and 5 year old (cuties and water as well as granola bars)
10:00 Get 8 yo started on math review
Read aloud with 10 year old (Beautiful Girlhood)
get a text from violin teacher that he's cancelling lessons that would have begun at 11:30
more coffee!!
nurse baby
10:20 redirect 8 yo to begin violin practice
get game down for 5yo (It's a Match)
put toddler on potty chair
baby to bassinet for nap in same room
10:40 8 yo goes to "time with Jesus" in our prayer room
10yo practice violin
change laundry-move one load to dryer, one to washer, fold what was in dryer
Read aloud Big Susan to 2yo and 5yo
11:00 13 yo returns home from band at local highschool
send 10yo and 2yo outside
change babys diaper
11:36 settle a violin squabble between 10 and 13yo as they are practicing for a Christmas program
check on two boys outside who are digging a hole in the garden plot
put baby in carrier and begin lunch with 5yo (pb&j, leftover soup, cheese sticks)
11:48 boys bring in treasures they have dug up
eat lunch with kids
put in another load of laundry
listen to Claude Debussy while eating (composer for this term)
Angelus prayer
chores begun by kids (sweep floor, toilets, put away folded laundry, clean up from lunch)
12:20 put toddler and baby down for nap by reading The Seven Silly Eaters and My World of Color by Margaret Wise Brown, read two pages of Winter Pascha for myself,
12:45 help 5yo load dishwasher from lunch, wipe off kitchen table
1:12 8yo practice violin for 5 minutes (second practice)
Read science and history books to 13yo, 10yo, 8yo and 5yo in den. Narrations
2:00 send 10yo and 5 yo girls outside for play time and dog poop pick up.
8yo is reprimanded for not obeying...sent to room for 5 minutes so mom can cool down
13yo begins chores (hadn't done them earlier)
2:15 8yo invited back downstairs, begins to make dinner (Chickpea Curry with Brown Rice) with mom
2:30 wake up toddler, poops in potty!!! hooray!!
toddler is refusing snack, pretending to be his uncle
change baby diaper
get rice ready...force 8yo to read the package on how to make the rice for dinner
have a chapstick dispute with 2yo
2:45 read Boyhood to Manhood book to 8yo while rice cooks
3:01 milk and cookies for all kids (10yo and 5yo come in with rosy cheeks)
10yo play with toddler in his room
13yo is editing a video she is making
mom chooses pictures for picture study of Grandma Moses
4:00 8 yo sets table, 10yo out to ride her bike and look for neighborhood friends, 5yo and 2yo playing in the back yard
Read aloud to the 13yo (I Kissed Dating Goodbye)
text a friend in China who has a birthday *today*
5:02 First aid for 5yo who busted her nose while playing on stumps in the backyard
baby down for nap after diaper change
make dessert (Cranberry Claufouti)
10yo comes home with a friend
5:25 Dessert goes into oven
friend is sent home
5:36 Daddy calls...on his way home from the hospital!
6:00 Dinner begins
6:10 Daddy comes home and joins us at the table
6:22 Table cleaned off and heading out the door for Mass
6:30-7:15 Mass (struggling with toddler and baby with help from older children...but we make it through another evening Mass! whew!)
Daddy begins to teach class on skype in closed room
7:30 clean up from dinner
13 yo unloads and reloads dishwasher
mom writes two thank you notes
everyone else gets on pajamas
7:48 prayers with those who have pj's on in prayer room
Crisis for 2yo as he can't find his favorite marble to sleep with
8:00 Marble still not found, but alternate toy has been chosen
Kisses from mom to all kids
Mother to downstairs with baby, reading her Year of Faith book and Charlotte Mason book
Glass of wine for mom in honor of her friends birthday
9:00 Mother turns on black and white movie
9:26 Daddy comes down from class, begins to iron his shirt for the next days work
(Mother feels bad that she didn't get around to it!)
Baby sleeping in mothers arms...but wakes as soon as she lays him in bassinet
10:04 Mother turns off lights and begins to go to bed Daddy joins her soon after
This is a fairly typical day. We would have had two hours of violin lessons on a typical Wednesday.
6:30am nurse a toddler, potty him
6:40 shower and dress--and even blow dry my hair
7:00 back to bed for coffee in bed (brought by my 8yo son) and personal prayer time
7:30 return two emails from my phone and head downstairs, encourage children to get dressed
8:00 supervise breakfast making in the kitchen
8:35 nurse 2 month old and begin prayer time with kids, Jesse Tree and OT readings
9:15 13 year old leave for band at the local high school
9:30 find toddler with all the stickers dumped out...help to clean these up, reading to 10yo and 8yo
9:50 2nd breakfast for toddler and 5 year old (cuties and water as well as granola bars)
10:00 Get 8 yo started on math review
Read aloud with 10 year old (Beautiful Girlhood)
get a text from violin teacher that he's cancelling lessons that would have begun at 11:30
more coffee!!
nurse baby
10:20 redirect 8 yo to begin violin practice
get game down for 5yo (It's a Match)
put toddler on potty chair
baby to bassinet for nap in same room
10:40 8 yo goes to "time with Jesus" in our prayer room
10yo practice violin
change laundry-move one load to dryer, one to washer, fold what was in dryer
Read aloud Big Susan to 2yo and 5yo
11:00 13 yo returns home from band at local highschool
send 10yo and 2yo outside
change babys diaper
11:36 settle a violin squabble between 10 and 13yo as they are practicing for a Christmas program
check on two boys outside who are digging a hole in the garden plot
put baby in carrier and begin lunch with 5yo (pb&j, leftover soup, cheese sticks)
11:48 boys bring in treasures they have dug up
eat lunch with kids
put in another load of laundry
listen to Claude Debussy while eating (composer for this term)
Angelus prayer
chores begun by kids (sweep floor, toilets, put away folded laundry, clean up from lunch)
12:20 put toddler and baby down for nap by reading The Seven Silly Eaters and My World of Color by Margaret Wise Brown, read two pages of Winter Pascha for myself,
12:45 help 5yo load dishwasher from lunch, wipe off kitchen table
1:12 8yo practice violin for 5 minutes (second practice)
Read science and history books to 13yo, 10yo, 8yo and 5yo in den. Narrations
2:00 send 10yo and 5 yo girls outside for play time and dog poop pick up.
8yo is reprimanded for not obeying...sent to room for 5 minutes so mom can cool down
13yo begins chores (hadn't done them earlier)
2:15 8yo invited back downstairs, begins to make dinner (Chickpea Curry with Brown Rice) with mom
2:30 wake up toddler, poops in potty!!! hooray!!
toddler is refusing snack, pretending to be his uncle
change baby diaper
get rice ready...force 8yo to read the package on how to make the rice for dinner
have a chapstick dispute with 2yo
2:45 read Boyhood to Manhood book to 8yo while rice cooks
3:01 milk and cookies for all kids (10yo and 5yo come in with rosy cheeks)
10yo play with toddler in his room
13yo is editing a video she is making
mom chooses pictures for picture study of Grandma Moses
4:00 8 yo sets table, 10yo out to ride her bike and look for neighborhood friends, 5yo and 2yo playing in the back yard
Read aloud to the 13yo (I Kissed Dating Goodbye)
text a friend in China who has a birthday *today*
5:02 First aid for 5yo who busted her nose while playing on stumps in the backyard
baby down for nap after diaper change
make dessert (Cranberry Claufouti)
10yo comes home with a friend
5:25 Dessert goes into oven
friend is sent home
5:36 Daddy calls...on his way home from the hospital!
6:00 Dinner begins
6:10 Daddy comes home and joins us at the table
6:22 Table cleaned off and heading out the door for Mass
6:30-7:15 Mass (struggling with toddler and baby with help from older children...but we make it through another evening Mass! whew!)
Daddy begins to teach class on skype in closed room
7:30 clean up from dinner
13 yo unloads and reloads dishwasher
mom writes two thank you notes
everyone else gets on pajamas
7:48 prayers with those who have pj's on in prayer room
Crisis for 2yo as he can't find his favorite marble to sleep with
8:00 Marble still not found, but alternate toy has been chosen
Kisses from mom to all kids
Mother to downstairs with baby, reading her Year of Faith book and Charlotte Mason book
Glass of wine for mom in honor of her friends birthday
9:00 Mother turns on black and white movie
9:26 Daddy comes down from class, begins to iron his shirt for the next days work
(Mother feels bad that she didn't get around to it!)
Baby sleeping in mothers arms...but wakes as soon as she lays him in bassinet
10:04 Mother turns off lights and begins to go to bed Daddy joins her soon after
This is a fairly typical day. We would have had two hours of violin lessons on a typical Wednesday.
Tuesday, July 24, 2012
Nurturing Mother-Daughter Relationships
My 12teen year old and I joined some other mothers and daughters to see an outdoor Shakespeare play. We brought a picnic dinner and ate on the lawn in the shade of an ancient oak tree. It was relaxing and nourishing. It's good to take time out from regular life and do something new.
It was a first for my daughter to see a full length Shakespeare play. We've been studying a play each year as part of our homeschooling. "As You Like It" was one she had read several times.
This same festival hosts play shorts for children which we have attended over the past summers. Those plays become more interactive and the children sit on the lawn.
My daughter found it refreshing to dip her toes in the fountain. It was hot-there has been quite a heat wave in the Central US.
Do you find nurturing mother-daughter relationships an enjoyable thing?
Saturday, July 21, 2012
Stolen Moments
This week as I drove alone with my 10 year old, we came across a field of sunflowers.
It was the kind of day in which I had been driving too much and felt overly exhausted. It was past dinner time and she'd been at art class for nearly 3 hours with no snacks. I knew toddler was at home
So I put aside my physical woes and stopped.
And we enjoyed. and made memories.
Do you ever wonder what might happen if you quit enjoying the moments given you?
It was the kind of day in which I had been driving too much and felt overly exhausted. It was past dinner time and she'd been at art class for nearly 3 hours with no snacks. I knew toddler was at home
So I put aside my physical woes and stopped.
And we enjoyed. and made memories.
Do you ever wonder what might happen if you quit enjoying the moments given you?
Saturday, July 7, 2012
Thoughts from my older sister...
Those of you who know me in real life are already asking, who is her OLDER sister?
Yes, you are right. I'm actually the oldest of my parents children.
But an older sister is so helpful! Doesn't everyone want one?
There have been times in my life that I have picked ladies older than I to emulate. I pick my own older sister!
Perhaps it was those years of early marriage when I watched wives taking extra care of themselves to always remain attractive to their husband.
Later it was picking a young mother to watch as she disciplined her child. (and maybe choosing to do it drastically different).
In those early years of schooling, I found older mentoring mothers who had home schooled through the grade school years and were heading into high school.
It can be so helpful to have friends, older sisters in the faith, to be an example for me to follow!
This month, when my husband's Columbia Magazine (go Knights of Columbus!) arrived, I noticed it focused on religious freedoms. There were articles that considered especially the witness of how we live our faith through our family life and NFP.
I cried as I read the article about someone I consider an older sister in the faith.
For many years a local priest friend of ours has called us the "Martin" family. (We have tender nicknames for him too.)
I'd read about them in this book after I was given it from a friend.
But this month I began to see Zelie and Louis Martin as older mentors in the faith in a new way. I knew about their nine children and how four of them died in infancy. That must have been so hard. All of my children remain healthy.
And then to have five daughters. Wow. What estrogen levels in the house! To have all five of them want to join the convent.
For Zelie to die an early death of cancer. It must have been a painful agonizing death knowing she would leave a young daughter.
Today what is heroic about their lives is that they simply lived.
They did their work quietly and must have spent plenty of time showing their children with their lives how to be Christians.
Their daughters didn't need lots of discussion or instruction, it was exuded from the life they were surrounded by. And Louis was able to continue this life after Zelie's death.
I'm not called to live a heroic life. I'm called to just consistently live my vocation as mother and wife. And I'm looking at my big sister Zelie to continue to show me the way.
And now in my amazon wish list is a book of some of letters of coorespondance of Zelie Martin.
Taken from Lisa Henley's book A Book of Saints for Catholic Moms
(a Christmas present from a godson!)
Blessed Louis and Blessed Zelie Martin
together you lived a happy and holy marriage raising a family who gave itself fully to service of God and others.
Help our family to follow your example of love, faithfulness and care of one another.
Intercede on our behalf, that we may honor our parents, live out our days in holiness and listen to God's call for our vocations.
Entrust to God our loved ones, especially our deceased parents, grandparents and relatives.
May our family someday know the happiness of life together with you and your children in heaven.
Amen.
And while you are at it, consider reading a great interview with Vicki Thorn (yet another older sister of mine!) found in this month's Columbia magazine!
Yes, you are right. I'm actually the oldest of my parents children.
But an older sister is so helpful! Doesn't everyone want one?
There have been times in my life that I have picked ladies older than I to emulate. I pick my own older sister!
Perhaps it was those years of early marriage when I watched wives taking extra care of themselves to always remain attractive to their husband.
Later it was picking a young mother to watch as she disciplined her child. (and maybe choosing to do it drastically different).
In those early years of schooling, I found older mentoring mothers who had home schooled through the grade school years and were heading into high school.
It can be so helpful to have friends, older sisters in the faith, to be an example for me to follow!
This month, when my husband's Columbia Magazine (go Knights of Columbus!) arrived, I noticed it focused on religious freedoms. There were articles that considered especially the witness of how we live our faith through our family life and NFP.
I cried as I read the article about someone I consider an older sister in the faith.
For many years a local priest friend of ours has called us the "Martin" family. (We have tender nicknames for him too.)
I'd read about them in this book after I was given it from a friend.
But this month I began to see Zelie and Louis Martin as older mentors in the faith in a new way. I knew about their nine children and how four of them died in infancy. That must have been so hard. All of my children remain healthy.
And then to have five daughters. Wow. What estrogen levels in the house! To have all five of them want to join the convent.
For Zelie to die an early death of cancer. It must have been a painful agonizing death knowing she would leave a young daughter.
Today what is heroic about their lives is that they simply lived.
They did their work quietly and must have spent plenty of time showing their children with their lives how to be Christians.
Their daughters didn't need lots of discussion or instruction, it was exuded from the life they were surrounded by. And Louis was able to continue this life after Zelie's death.
I'm not called to live a heroic life. I'm called to just consistently live my vocation as mother and wife. And I'm looking at my big sister Zelie to continue to show me the way.
And now in my amazon wish list is a book of some of letters of coorespondance of Zelie Martin.
Taken from Lisa Henley's book A Book of Saints for Catholic Moms
(a Christmas present from a godson!)
Blessed Louis and Blessed Zelie Martin
together you lived a happy and holy marriage raising a family who gave itself fully to service of God and others.
Help our family to follow your example of love, faithfulness and care of one another.
Intercede on our behalf, that we may honor our parents, live out our days in holiness and listen to God's call for our vocations.
Entrust to God our loved ones, especially our deceased parents, grandparents and relatives.
May our family someday know the happiness of life together with you and your children in heaven.
Amen.
And while you are at it, consider reading a great interview with Vicki Thorn (yet another older sister of mine!) found in this month's Columbia magazine!
Tuesday, April 3, 2012
Books to teach virtue in little girls...
I begin an intentional growing of virtue and insitilling of purity in my daughters when they are young. We have lots of conversations, often lead by them. It helps that we are home together each day so that anytime of day or night they want to talk, I'm nearly always available (at least physically!).
Some books that we have enjoyed and continue to enjoy are:
I'd Be Your Princess by O'Brien
This book really stresses the fathers role in helping a girl understand who she is and who God wants her to be.
The Princess and the Kiss
Some books that we have enjoyed and continue to enjoy are:
I'd Be Your Princess by O'Brien
The Princess and the Kiss
I'm not sure my current 5 year old understands this whole concept, but knowing that there is a special thing to hold onto until you are married resonates with her. And we are still all about princesses here.
We do own the Squire and the Scroll and the Garden Wall books. These don't get read as often so I didn't include them as "favorites".
Do you have any favorite books that encourage discussion of virtue and purity with your children?
Saturday, February 25, 2012
Sunday, January 29, 2012
I wonder what I want in a son-in-law
For the past 17 months, I have been going with my daughter to a moms/daughters book group. We first read through Beautiful Girlhood. All sorts of growing and maturing discussions followed. The group grew in it's strength as the girls shared and the moms listened. It blossomed most when the moms were able to talk less and listen more.
We are currently reading Before you Marry Prince Charming. It's been a great lesson in learning how a girl perceives and is perceived in her royalty of Christ our King. More than anything, I love how reading this book and going to a discussion brings out new ideas in my daughter. We are able to share so much more in this ongoing talk we have about growing up.
So this past month we read a chapter that included making a list of the desirable qualities of a mate and a list of the required things in a mate. It was so neat to see that there were things that we agreed upon! I made a list with hubby while we were away on a little trip (see previous post~!). And I refused to look at my daughters list until we were well into the discussion at another families house.
Wow. To look at what she chose and what I chose! I see that she has embraced some of the values that we hold, and has chosen some values of her own.
Here's my list: (but we won't need a husband for about 20 more years right? as she's only 12...)
Required qualities in a husband for my daughter (for my son-in-law)
*A Christian who desires formation: Wants to continue to grow in God, to be formed and practically engages in formation (Bible studies, class, pilgrimages, retreats, direction)
*Wants children
*Takes initiative for work and play. Is a worker: provides well for family, not lazy or given to pursuit of childish, useless activities.
*Values education/ongoing learning
*Exhibits (or tries to) the Cardinal Virtues: is a man of prudence, temperance, justice, fortitude.
*Genuine and authentic: he is how he appears, there is only one of him.
*Respect and Reverence: never abusive, explosive, passive aggressive or sarcastic but is innocent and straightforward, loving our daughter and serving her habitually to be the person she should be in God.
*Gives to the poor and vulnerable.
*Is handy enough to do home repairs and upgrades.
Nice qualities but not required
Tall
Handsome
Sense of humor
Intuitive
From a large family
Parents are still married
And just to keep it real, I'm praying that if marriage is God's plan for my "little" girl that he's got his hand in the life of that boy somewhere. And that's he's blessing the parents as they do their best in modeling virtue.
Do you pray for the spouse (or the religious order) of which your child will be bonded to some day?
Tuesday, January 3, 2012
What I love about 4 year olds
There is always a song being hummed or created impromtu.
She loves books and will insist that you read RIGHT NOW!
She loves books and will insist that you read RIGHT NOW!
She was able to sit through the entire Nutcracker show this year. And was enthralled!
Her job for the month of December was "junior chef". The place settings are really coming along!
Since Fancy Nancy continues to be her favorite, she can be found choosing the real silverware often.
Letters and fine motor skills are really coming along!
Dress up you say? Absolutely.
Kind to younger sibling. (Santa parade)
Recently went to the dentist and asked me to stay in the waiting room! I snuck back in time to take a shot of the floride treatment! What a girl.
What you can't capture on film is the funny things she says. She keeps us laughing.
She fits right in with the prankster joyful family she's growing up in!
(last s'more cookout of 2011).
Monday, December 5, 2011
the kind of super heros we aspire to...
A daughter in this household whose name begins with a C finds images important. Those that she makes and those that can inspire. This one found on the fridge she made to encourage herself to do those things I ask her to do that might not be her first choice.
Monday, November 7, 2011
Book Review: My Wilder Life
By Wendy McClure.
I'm not much different than other Midwestern girls. I read the "Laura" books as a child. I've read them at least once to my oldest daughters and now they are reading them to the little girl in the family.
We've done the butter churning (ahem heavy cream shaking) experiments and the corn cob doll making andthe pigs blatter balloon. eww. We did not do that, even though my kids wanted to....We've done the unit studies like other homeschoolers.
We've visited the site where the books were written and done unit studies in our homeschool around the Laura Ingalls Wilder books.
When I came across this book chronicling a Midwest woman's look (and trips) into her childhood memories with the Laura books, I put in my request with the local library.
So what did I think?
Wendy finds a worn set of Laura books and begins her memory trips into her childhood. She (married after the book comes out I believe) drags her boyfriend on many trips and experiments to find the truthfulness in her memories about the real life events of Laura, Mary and Ma and Pa Ingalls. I enjoyed her fact finding,
mostly.
She follows footsteps (or rather wagon ruts) of Laura all across the Midwest and journals it along the way. She (even though she lives in the Windy City) forgets that we can have some pretty dozy winters around here.
I appreciated her candid images of what she did and did not like about each site visited. Her boyfriend kindly reads the books so that he can understand her journey. I think he must really care about her!
For myself I think that reading this chronicle of sorts was lengthy...and perhaps I could have enjoyed listening to her give a speech or talk about her book instead. At times, I'm sorry to say, I skimmed. My eyes were not as focused as when I read the real Laura books. Perhaps because I don't experience all the books the way Wendy did.
What I did like of the book is that she didn't give up when she had obstacles in her way. I laughed when she decided she needed to own a butter churn of her own. (did I say that she lives in Chicago?) I agreed with her that living in the country would be a fun thing to try. I wouldn't pay to spend the night on someone else's farm like she did. But then again there are farms that are owned in my family and I have spent the night on them before.
I think she misses the joy of reading as a child. I think the most fun I have had with the Laura books is sharing them with my girls. I'd like her to write a sequel in x years when she's had her own child to read with! Perhaps that is when she will come full circle with her memories. For a daughter and a mother have things that only the two of them (or in my case the four of them) can share.
I'm not much different than other Midwestern girls. I read the "Laura" books as a child. I've read them at least once to my oldest daughters and now they are reading them to the little girl in the family.
We've done the butter churning (ahem heavy cream shaking) experiments and the corn cob doll making and
We've visited the site where the books were written and done unit studies in our homeschool around the Laura Ingalls Wilder books.
When I came across this book chronicling a Midwest woman's look (and trips) into her childhood memories with the Laura books, I put in my request with the local library.
So what did I think?
Wendy finds a worn set of Laura books and begins her memory trips into her childhood. She (married after the book comes out I believe) drags her boyfriend on many trips and experiments to find the truthfulness in her memories about the real life events of Laura, Mary and Ma and Pa Ingalls. I enjoyed her fact finding,
mostly.
She follows footsteps (or rather wagon ruts) of Laura all across the Midwest and journals it along the way. She (even though she lives in the Windy City) forgets that we can have some pretty dozy winters around here.
I appreciated her candid images of what she did and did not like about each site visited. Her boyfriend kindly reads the books so that he can understand her journey. I think he must really care about her!
For myself I think that reading this chronicle of sorts was lengthy...and perhaps I could have enjoyed listening to her give a speech or talk about her book instead. At times, I'm sorry to say, I skimmed. My eyes were not as focused as when I read the real Laura books. Perhaps because I don't experience all the books the way Wendy did.
What I did like of the book is that she didn't give up when she had obstacles in her way. I laughed when she decided she needed to own a butter churn of her own. (did I say that she lives in Chicago?) I agreed with her that living in the country would be a fun thing to try. I wouldn't pay to spend the night on someone else's farm like she did. But then again there are farms that are owned in my family and I have spent the night on them before.
I think she misses the joy of reading as a child. I think the most fun I have had with the Laura books is sharing them with my girls. I'd like her to write a sequel in x years when she's had her own child to read with! Perhaps that is when she will come full circle with her memories. For a daughter and a mother have things that only the two of them (or in my case the four of them) can share.
Monday, July 11, 2011
Simple gifts
My sink (as you might remember) faces a wall. Husband has been busy at work making a new look around the sink. First the faucet was replaced. That hot water handle had gotten so much use over the past five years that it was leaky and corroded. I am always trying to make the time at the sink more appealing.
The kitchen Madonna has fresh Rudbekia blooms. You have to look closer to see the best gift a husband could give. (click on the photo below for closeup)
Last month when he went away to school he found this is little bottle in the "give away" pile. I wonder how much this bottle witnessed of blessings over the years.
Wednesday, June 8, 2011
Book Review: Beautiful Girlhood
For the past 10 (!!) months, three other mothers and I have gathered our daughters towards a journey. We've been reading Beautiful Girlhood (revised by Karen Andreola) with our lovely daughters and meeting monthly as a transition towards womanhood.
Several times over the past two years I freaked out considered my daughter was racing towards adolescence. I wanted to approach it with her in confidence and not fear.
I keenly remember those years of jr. high. Braces, outbursts, growing pains both physical and emotional, desiring to be someone I was yet to discover....So I decided to surround myself with like minded mothers and daughters.
I found three strangers. And they have become my friends. They carry the same heartaches and struggles as homeschooling mothers. And we are holding each others hands.
Isn't it neat how a book can have such an impact on your life? It can mold you further into that someone you want to be and can lift you up.
It can also hold you down. Making wise decisions about what you read (esp. for moms and girls) is very important.
This month our chapters included "making friends with books".
So I made book marks for the mothers. I included the verse that we thought might help us in choosing what to read as daughter and as mothers.
Philippians 4:8.
The girls made their own bookmarks after our meeting and sharing.
One girl suggested that the test used on a book is "A book that could be read aloud to your parents and pastor". If a book can't be read aloud to the adults in your life, then it shouldn't be read at all. I really thought that was a great "test" for a book.
For the bookmarks I made, I included the copywork from the Companion Guide.
Life being very short; and the quiet hours of it few,
we ought to waste none of them in reading valueless books.
John Ruskin (1819-1900)
A book is the best of friends,
the same today and forever.
Martin Tupper (1810-1889)
Sunday, May 15, 2011
Industry
Almost two years ago (after reading several Thomas Jefferson education books), I started my oldest daughter on a home program to be able to run a household by the time she is 18. We had been studying a saint who had exhibited the virtue of Industry. So our program became "the industry program".
The program includes home classes on cooking, sewing, baking, basic maintenance and the like. I printed a simple booklet for her to follow and use as a checklist. From time to time we visit the booklet and see what she's accomplished on our lists and what things she might be missing. Some items she has taken classes for such as First Aid and CPR.
I introduced this program to her around her 10th birthday. This week she learned how to replace windshield wipers on daddy's car and put together a new push lawnmower. Last month she accompanied daddy on lawnmower maintenance for a friend. We are working on her "I wish to learn this during the summer of 2011" list.
You can view and print the booklet here. Let me know how it works for you!
The program includes home classes on cooking, sewing, baking, basic maintenance and the like. I printed a simple booklet for her to follow and use as a checklist. From time to time we visit the booklet and see what she's accomplished on our lists and what things she might be missing. Some items she has taken classes for such as First Aid and CPR.
I introduced this program to her around her 10th birthday. This week she learned how to replace windshield wipers on daddy's car and put together a new push lawnmower. Last month she accompanied daddy on lawnmower maintenance for a friend. We are working on her "I wish to learn this during the summer of 2011" list.
You can view and print the booklet here. Let me know how it works for you!